unreal

I dreamed of you again
Of us, sir.
I don't know why and i don't know how.
Maybe there is a science to it.
But we were so happy.
Really happy.

It's nice seeing you again.
There were those silent moments that i was just staring at you
Looking at you
Smiling.

It is unreal to see you like that
To be that person with me.
But I enjoyed it.
Maybe i knew that it was a fleeting moment.
Maybe i knew it was a dream.

the code

nope. no. this is not one of those geek things. :) but you may already know that.
why else would she write? right?

i re-watched Fate of the Furious today with Mimi. (she haven't watched it)
if you're a fan, you know that Dom lives by a code.

I just realize that I've been living by the same code.
You may say, "and so is everyone else"
I say, "well good for us"
I can't speak for anyone else but i really take this Family seriously.
if i had to rank...
everything else is secondary.
or maybe coffee is 2nd then everything else comes next (haha)

my favorite family is my sister.
i was kinda forced into it (maybe) because i only got one sibling but the role really stocked in me
ever since our world began
can't remember a time i regret being "ate"
i know our age difference is just a year and sometimes she is more mature than me
i know i only want what's best for her in any case, any time, any where
i always think that maybe i have this mother's instinct when it comes to her
and i hate to say it but most of the time i know and feel its true
never have i turn my back on her, not once or  when "push comes to shove" i always stay on her side and cover for her
maybe il get mad at her, over react and start a fight with her privately in our own time
she thinks im just attacking her all the time
but that is to understand her and let out all my feelings too
i always tell her these:
it hurts a lot when she's the first person i trust and she does not trust me
it hurts when she knows i will never doubt her but im the first person she doubts
i hate the lies
she thinks i don't know them
because i can't do anything
i have to play the part
i need to be understanding and patient and let her make her decisions which i can only hope to be right, try to still trust her make the better choices

it deeply pains me everyday when i look at her but then again...
"You don't turn your back on family"